What Do You Believe?

On Mondays I usually write about the sermon on Sunday. (Click here to hear it.) Today, since I left the few notes I do take at home, I won’t be.
Today, I’m focusing on one statement.

“What you believe determines how you behave.”

That’s it! Okay, Lord. When am I going to get this? I have a lot of negative thoughts about myself. It’s a terrible struggle.

I want to behave the way I believe…
I do know that I’m a child of God.

I don’t act like it sometimes. For years I didn’t believe God loved me. I could encourage others with those words, but didn’t believe them for me. I don’t know where this comes from. I didn’t believe God would love me if there were things still “wrong” with me. I’m not going to share all the things I believe to be negative about myself. I want to overcome this way of thinking. I know that by God’s grace & with His help I can be an overcomer!

It surprises me when someone says something positive about me or pays me a compliment. It’s difficult for me to accept. My first response is to reply with something negative about myself because surely, they’ve overlooked it. Crazy isn’t it? I’ve shared with you before about my struggles with making friends. I was too busy protecting myself. In my mind I had convinced myself that as soon as they discover all my negatives, they’ll be gone. I figured I wouldn’t try because I already knew the outcome.

I have a wonderful husband who builds my confidence everyday. He’s so patient with me. I’m trying real hard here not to insert something negative about myself. I’ve hit the delete button a few times. Please don’t give up on me!

I envy those that are self confident. No, not those that think too highly of themselves. I’m talking about those with a healthy-God-given-self-confidence. My relationship with myself is not positive. I use to think that when people said things like, “you need to learn to love yourself,” were crazy! But, you know, there’s truth to that. There’s a balance that I long to find. Daily, I get a little closer as I go about this journey of discovering what makes relationships positive!

Do you struggle with beating yourself up? Are you confident? Share with me your struggles & your achievements!
Shell
{photo from picapp}
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Author: Michelle

I'm Michelle. A Child of the King. A dreamer. My first love, Jesus, is who I want to reflect in my life more than anything. I'm also a determined artist on a quest to learn as much as I can about graphic design, hand lettering & all things creative. It's here where my love for Jesus & all things creative come together in only a way that God can orchestrate.

2 thoughts on “What Do You Believe?”

  1. Shell, You and I are so much alike. Every time I read your post I think that maybe you can hear my own heart. I do talk out loud allot so maybe you are hearing me from miles away.
    I was just talking to a friend today about how I contently am looking for approval from others. I second guess myself all the time. Did I say that right? Are they offended by what I said? Do they think I'm crazy, a know it all, or just plain self absorbed? I hate this so much about me, just when I think I have dealt with it there it is again, The big self-centered monster staring back at me. For me anyway I know that I think of myself and how I am perceived far more than others think of me. Like you I know God loves me and only His thoughts of me should matter, but reconciling the thought to my heart and vice versa I just can't seem to do. I truly just want to be free from the burden and fear. I'll pray for you, please pray for me. I just want to be seen as a godly woman seeking the heart of her God not the approval of man.
    Tammy

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  2. Isn't it wonderful though, that God can still use us regardless of our own insecurities. A few weeks back you wrote an incredible blog post about Pausing. I even shared it in summary with our life team….your words had such an impact on me & at just the right time. I've been pausing ever since.

    I think as women, living in a world of comparisons, that it's just so easy to lose sight of the fact that the Lord created each of us with our own unique quirks and twist because he delighted in our differences. We all, book wise know that, but allowing it to sink into our hearts, is so hard. And even if we do let it sink in, it's so easy to get discouraged and be back to square one. But then it's often those struggles that send us back to our knees in humbleness. Well, that's me at least :o)

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